AN: destroy Karkat's confidence, and life
by scarredmewtwo
Summary: A mysterious chum named Ana pesters Karkat about how he's too fat, little does she know it'll send him into a hell he will live for years, and maybe die in. TRIGGER WARNING: ANOREXIA, AND SELF HARM
1. Chapter 1

_**yes another story about Anorexia, but it's the only way i can get my feelings out so, i hope you like it, whoever's reading. (5/30 edit: all the trolls will live together)**_

Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you have a problem no one knows about. This problem explains your rage, and your temper. It is why you are like this, and why you don't go back. You've had it forever, and you don't want to rid it. You are suffering form a disorder; a painful disorder, from Anorexia Nervosa. You can only wear long sleeves because of the scars you have. You are fucking sick, and you don't want to get better. Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you suffer from Anorexia Nervosa.

Carcinogeneticist began pestering Ana Nervon:

CG: HELP ME ANA MY LIFE FUCKING SUCKS.

AN: YOu must believe in being )(thin)(

CG: CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THAT FUCKASS OR DO I HAVE TO BE ALONE.

AN: LIsten to me, i'll be there. I'm your only friend and I'll tell you how to be )(thin)(. I'll list steps if you tell me your current weight when I do.

CG: ARE YOU SURE FUCKASS, OR ARE YOU JUST LYING, BITCH.

AN: DOn't worry, you'll be ok, I'll help you

CG: I'LL ONLY FUCKING SAY THIS SHIT ONCE, BUT…THANK YOU.

AN: YOur welcome CG, you're welcome.

Ana Nervon ceased pestering with CarcinoGeneticist at 11:23 pm.

Karkat sighed, and looked at his arm, the one he just cut.

"I wish the pain would just leave, so I can be normal again." He sat in the same room that started his disorder; the bedroom, and cried. He cried most of the night, and into the morning where he heard a message ding.

EctoBiologist began pestering CarcinoGebeticist:

EB: hey Karkat.

CG: FUCK DO YOU WANT

EB: I just wanted to see how you were. Karkat stared, he wanted to say not fine, but that would spill it, so he stuck with what he said to everyone.

CG: I'M FINE

EB: that's nice to hear

CG: WHY DID YOU FUCKING PESTER ME IF ALL YOU WANTED TO ASK HOW I WAS

EB: Well there was something, but I forgot it, sorry.

CG: NOW GO AWAY, AND MIND YOUR OWN SHIT EGBERT

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering with EctoBiologist at 9:58 am.

"Boy, I'm such an idiot." He went to lay on his bed, and at that moment sollux decides to burst through the door.

"KARKAT!" Karkat sat up.

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT SOLLUX?!" Sollux stood there.

"Uh, well… I wanted to 2ee you." Karkat looked away.

"Why?" Sollux walked a little closer.

"You haven't been out of your room for days now, are you ok?" Karkat laid back down.

"I'm fine, now get your ass out of my room before I flip my shit." Sollux backed away again.

"Geez Karkat, why 2o mad?"

"Just leave Sollux, just leave," Sollux shrugged, and left the room, closing the door behind him. "Why do I do this, why do I care, I should be dead. I should not live right now, for no one cares." Then he remembered Ana's words: "I'll give you tips if you tell me your current weight" Karkat sighed, and went to the bathroom, and sighed.

"If I really want to be thin, then I must do this." He stepped on the piece of metal, and sighed last time he weighed himself was about six years ago, and he was about 8. He was 73 pounds then, and now at age 14, and after three years of anorexia, he is now at 95, and dropping.

"Karkat, you fat fuck, you'll never be thin again." Kanaya was walking past the bathroom when Karkat said that. (Yes most trolls live together, but not all only Soullux, Karkat, Terezi, Gamzee, and Kanaya, the rest live other places.) She knocked.

"Karkat, are you ok."

"I'M FINE KANAYA FUCKING FINE!"

"Are you sure, you're yelling." Karkat sounded distressed.

"YEAH, NOW GO!"

'Just tell me if anything's bothering you." Karkat sighed. He'd never tell Kanaya anything, this was his disease, and only his, and no one else wanted it. He was the only one who deserved it. He cried again. He sat there for hours not letting anyone in, he didn't move, and soon he heard the ding of pesterchum.

Ana Nervon began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: HEy what's your weight?

CG: FUCKING 95 POUNDS. FAT RIGHT

AN: WEll we could aim for 76 or maybe even 70, that's our goal, and I have a way…

CG: WHAT, TELL ME THE FUCKING WAY

AN: YOu could take two fingers, and stick them down your throat

CG: I'LL TRY

AN: THanks, remember only when you've reached our goal will you be )(thin)(

Ana Nervon has ceased pestering with CarcinoGeneticisct at 11:30 am.

"So all I have to do is stick two fingers down my throat." Karkat did it, and out came the measly portion of food he had that day. He saw in the mirror his stomach looked a bit flatter, and he felt better.

"That was all you needed, no more." He walked back to his room, and lay on his bed in the dark room. He liked the dark, it made him feel better, how he could see no one. Soon he fell asleep, and didn't wake up for hours. When he did wake up, it was late, but he didn't want to sleep.

TwinArmageddons began trolling CarcinoGeneticist:

TA: hey karkat!

TA: Karakt

TA: hey

TA: are you even awake

TA: iit'2 been an hour and you haven't responded

CG: LOOK I'M FUCKING RESPONDING RIGHT NOW, THERE YOU ASS

TA: woah karkat, calm your2elf

CarcinoGeneticist ceased trolling with TwinArmageddons at 9:47 pm.

"Why do people even fucking care for me, it's not like I'm special?" Karkat sat there again, in that chair the one that started this three years back. He slowly got up, and walked to the bathroom


	2. Chapter 2: AN: lead Karkat into stage 2

**So this chapter may not be too good, but here is the second chapter.**

Karkat looked in the mirror, looking at himself made him cringe.

"95 pounds is a little too much for you." He looked at his stomach, and then he sucked it in. when he did it was hollow, hollowed in, more hollow than flat.

"You fat fuck, just leave." He wanted to punch the mirror, and he almost did, but he remembered he needed it to see himself.

"Fuck this." And at that he left the bathroom. He ran into Sollux as he was walking down to dinner.

"Hey Karkat, how'2 iit going?"

"Fine." They walked in silence toward the dinning room (Yes they all eat together).

"Hello Karkat and Sollux." Kanaya greeted them.

"Hello Kanaya, are we late again?" Kanaya nodded.

"You guys sure are, seriously will you two ever be on time." Karkat shook his head.

"No, I'll never be on time for this shit, I mean fucking seriously who is?"

"That's true, everyone's either late or early."

"Can we 2iit down now." Kanaya nodded.

"Yeah, you may." Karkat cringed as he sat down, he hated talking to Kanaya. He was scared she'd figure out about his problem in no time.

"Hey Karkat." Terezi was licking a plate again.

"Hey." Gamzee snuck over, and honked his horn in Karkat's ear.

"HoNk!" Karkat flinched, and flailed his arm, everyone else laughed.

"Fucking seriously Gamzee, do you need to honk that shit in my face, you ass." Gamzee held his hands up.

"Whoa Karkat, it was just a motherfucking joke." Karkat rolled his eyes, and looked at his plate, he ate only the "safe foods", and cut the rest into pieces so no one would know.

"Hey, Karkat." Vriska walked over to him.

"What do YOU want fuckass?" she leaned on his chair.

"I just wanted to ask you a question."

"What?" she motioned for him to come outside into the hall.

"It's private." Karkat grumbled, and walked with her. "why would Vriska out of everybody care, I mean Sollux almost doesn't even care, only really Vriska has confronted me." He thought.

"So you are supposed to be the lead designer right?" Karkat nodded.

"For your team yes."

"Well why don't you get your damn ass moving, and get some ideas, me Feferi, and Eridan are becoming impatient."

"I have some designs, I'll come to your room after dinner." Vriska nodded.

"You promise right." He nodded. They walked back in to the room.

"Hey, what wa2 that all about."

"The design thing Kanaya assigned us all." Sollux nodded.

"Why would 2he assiing us something, it's not like 2she'2 the leader?" Karkat went to clean his plate. It was pretty much still full.

"Hey, you didn't really have an appetite today." Karat shook his head.

"I know I didn't, I'm just not really hungry." Eridan nodded.

"It's ok, wwe'vve all had that feeling." Eridan walked away saying nothing else, and thinking nothing else of it.

"Why do people care to ask me about this, I mean I'm seriously not worth it." Karkat walked back to his room.

Ana Nervon pestered CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: CG?

AN: YOu there?

AN: TEll me, I can give you more tips

CG: HELLO!

AN: GOod you're still here, I thought you were gone already.

CG: WHY WOULD I DO A FUCKING STUPID THING LIKE THAT, SERIOUSLY.

AN: I Don't know, but I can give you more tips

CG: NOT RIGHT NOW, BUT MAYBE WHEN I'M NOT STUCK HAVING TO SHOW THINGS TO MY FRIENDS.

AN: I Thought you had no friends

Ana Nervon ceased pestering with CarcinoGeneticist at 7:35 pm.

"I have friends, like Sollux, and Terezi, even Gamzee." Karkat remembered his promise.

"Oh, fuck, I have to show the design to Vriska." He ran one light down, two rooms to the right. He knocked.

"Hello, did you bring them." Karkat showed the 3d models to the others.

"May I ask what Feferi and Eridan are doing here." She looked over.

"Oh, they're here to see the designs to."

"Yeah, wwe wwant to see the designs to." Karkat walked inside, the inside was different than his room. His room was dark, and it had a computer, desk, chair, and bed. This room was 10 times bigger, the essentials, and then Vriska had a TV, and other things with it.

"Well, I have the design for the human car, and for the house." Karkat was explaining everything, and as he finished it neared about 9: 03.

"Well sorry for that, but you told me to, have a good night." Karkat left the room. There was silence, Feferi was the first one to speak.

"Something's off about Karkat, he seems, sad, depressed even." Vriska sat back in her chair.

"Well isn't he like that normally." Eridan nodded.

"He may be now, but remember a couple years ago Karkat would play with us, and smile." Feferi argued back.

"Wwell I did see him scrape a plate full of food into the garbage, almost nothing eaten, all he said was 'not hungry.'" Vriska leaned in.

"Y'know he seems to be skinnier, and I touched his arm today, and he just flinched." Everyone nodded.

"Let's wait a little to see where it goes." The rest agreed.

"Wwell good night everyone." Eridan left, and the rest soon followed. Karkat was sitting in the dark alone on the steps. In his right hand was a razor, and it still had blood on it. His left arm had fresh cuts, many of them. He heard Eridan walking down the stairs.

"Fuck." He whispered and ran, trying not to make sound. Eridan saw a shadow whipping out the door, but thought nothing of it.

"Wwho's there?" Karkat ran back to his room.


	3. Chapter 3: AN: Lead Karkat to stage 3

**This chapter is long because I had a lot of inspiration, and it's still not as good as I was hoping, it'll never be. I tried to go off some of my own experiences, I know how it feels. This is my life right now. It's sad, but true. Again these story help me write my feelings. :)**

Karkat Looked around in his room.

"Why do you fucking listen to Ana, why do you?" Karkat heard a voice in his head.

"You listen to her because you want to be thin right?" Was he talking to himself, his mind vs his anorexic mind.

"Listen, you are thin enough, you look like a stick."

"No, you need to be thinner, Ana told you so."

"You don't, look don't listen to her she's trying to do this to you, she doesn't even know who you are."

"She doesn't, but she's giving you great tips, and she's a friend to you, listen to her." The other voice disappeared, and Karkat stood up. He looked at the clock: 10:49

"I should go to bed." So he did. He woke up in the morning, and there was a pester from Ana.

Ana Nervon began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: HEy CG, what's your weight?

CG: I DON'T FUCKING KNOW, I'LL CHECK

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering with Ana Nervon at 7:51 am. He went to the bathroom, and first looked in the mirror. He saw so much, legs like stumps, his stomach looked like a bulge.

"Damn you, your still way too fat." Karkat sighed, and stepped on the scale.

"85 pounds." He shook his head, and walked back to his room.

CarcinoGeneticist began pestering Ana Nervon:

CG: 85 FUCKING POUNDS

"AN: PRogress, good job, but to be )(thin)( you need to lose 10 more pounds.

CG: I'LL DO IT

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering with Ana Nervon at 8:04 am.

"So, 75 pounds is my goal huh, well if that's my goal let me achieve it." Karkat heard voices outside his door, Sollux, Terezi, and Nepeta.

"Fuck, what do they want." He heard a knock.

"Karkat, breakfast." _Fuck, fuck FUCK. Breakfast is always hard to skip. _ (I changed thinking to italics.) He sighed and walked down with them. They arrived at the hall, and Karkat went to sit at his seat. The food looked good, but Karkat didn't want any of it.

"Hey, Karkat." It was Gamzee. Karkat looked away.

"Fuck you want Makara?" Gamzee pointed to Karkat's full plate.

"You gonna eat?' Karkat shook his head.

"No, I'm not hungry." Gamzee reached over to grab his plate.

"Can I have it?" Karkat shrugged and smiled.

"Sure." Gamzee traded plates with Karkat, and now it looked like Karkat had eaten. _Fuck yes! I can lie again and pretend I'm eating. _ He got tapped on the shoulder by Nepeta.

"Hey, Karkitty." He turned around.

"What do you want?" She looked away, then looked back at him. _Fuck I swear if she confronts me._

"Could you please get Equius for me." Karkat's tense shoulders dropped. _Ok good no confrontation._

"Hey Equius." Equius turned around.

"Yeah, Karkat?"

"Nepeta wants you." Equius got up, and walked over.

"What did you want Nepeta." She motioned to go outside of the room. They left.

"So have you seen Karkat lately." Equius shook his head.

"No, he hides himself in his room and under tons of sweaters." She nodded.

"He does, but it bothers me. He seems so thin." Equius looked at Karkat. The one not eating, the one who traded his plate with Gamzee to avoid eating.

"Well he does seem thinner. His temper has become worse than it was three years ago." Nepeta nodded.

"Yeah, he's also only wearing long sleeves, and that could hint to self harm." Equius crossed his arms a little.

"Should we confront him sometime." Nepeta nodded.

"Yeah, and he'll probably deny it, but just keep asking till he tells you the truth." They walked back into the room, and sat at their spots_ they were talking about me I just know it. _10 minutes later breakfast was over. Karkat walked back to his room. John had pestered him:

EctoBiologist began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

EB: hey, karkat

EB: karkat?

CG: WHAT DO YOU FUCKING WANT JOHN

EB: geez chill, i just wanted to say hi

CG: WHY

EB: you haven't pestered me in weeks

CG: WELL I HAVEN'T PESTERED DAVE IN MONTHS AND HE ISN'T COMPLAINING

EB: he's a little busy

CG: WELL AREN'T YOU, BUT YOU STILL PESTER ME

EB: i'm not as busy as dave

CG: STILL NO ONE IS COMPLAINING BUT YOU

EB: you seem a little off

CG: HOW

EB: well you seem even more annoyed than normal

CG: WHY WOULD YOU NOTICE A FUCKING THING LIKE THAT

EB: i can kinda tell

CG: FUCK YOU

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering with EctoBiologist at 9:34 am.

Karkat sat on his bed, rolling up his sleeve. He got the razor from his desk drawer. He stuck it to his arm, trying to find a spot for it. Then he slid it back and forth, the cut ;bleeding now, was deep. Karkat's breathing was even, and his heart still had arrhythmias. He watched the cut as it bled the crimson blood. The blood stained his sheets, and the floor. He heard a knock. _Fuck, just great Sollux decides to come right now._ He opened the door.

"Hey Karkitty." It was Nepeta, and… wait Equius. _The fuck is going on_.

"What do you want?" He looked at his arms, and rolled down his sleeves.

"Tell us what's wrong, the last couple months you've been acting weird, rejecting food, you've only worn long sleeves, and you've isolated yourself in your room most of the day." Karkat looked down, and started shifting his weight from foot to foot.

"Nothing, maybe I'm just fucking not hungry, and maybe I'm cold." Equius started going.

"I can't see this, I'll just get mad." The door slammed. Nepeta sat next to Karkat.

"Look Karkitty, tell me what's wrong." Karkat looked away, and then looked at Nepeta's face. It was smiling.

"Nothing, look nothing is wrong. Stay out of my shit." She touched his arms. He flinched.

"If nothing's wrong then show me your arms." Karkat hid his arms.

"Why do you need to see my arms?"

"Well if you're not hiding something you'll show them to me, but if you aren't you'll keep them hidden." _Fuck, who knew Nepeta knew so much. She's become so serious all of a sudden. _Karkat held on to his arms.

"I'm telling you nothing's wrong now leave you fuckass." She put her hand on the sleeve, and started rolling it up. Nothing at first, but soon they were revealed. The scarred ones lower, but as she rolled up further she found the new ones. Her fingers ran up and down his arm.

"Karkat, why?" he shook his head.

"Why should I tell you, it's my own problem, let me deal with it myself." She rolled up the other sleeve, and saw the new cut, the deep one.

"But continue like this, and you'll kill yourself."

"If that happens then let it happen." Nepeta looked into his eyes.

"Look, if that were to happen we would all feel lost, you're one of us Karkat." Nepeta removed her hand.

"Look, who even cares about me?" She hugged him, Nepeta felt his bones protruding out of his back. They were sharp. A tear ran down her face.

"Karkat, I care, I'll always care."

"Please tell no one, this is for my own good, I don't deserve better." She removed her hand from his back.

"Your ribs, they're so sharp." Karkat ran his hand over his back.

"Well they're ribs they're supposed to show." She ran her hand over his chest.

"They're not supposed to show, they never should." Karkat shook his head.

"Well they should, it looks better, now please leave."

"Try to stop this please." Karkat nodded, but he didn't smile.

"I'll try." _I will not try, my first confrontation, and I told her not to tell anyone, but oh fuck, what if she does. Shit, my whole life would be over. Fuck, fuck, fuck. _ Karkat walked to his favorite spot; the stairs, and sat there with his razor. He sat there for a 30 minutes, but he couldn't withstand temptation. He went to the bathroom. (second floor, all bathrooms are the same) he looked into the mirror, and saw the image Ana planted into his mind. He started crying.

"Maybe if I see my weight has dropped I'll be a little happier." He stepped on the scale. (Let's just say they have scales on both floors.)

"84 pounds, your weight has dropped by one pound, and by that rate it'll take 9 more days till you are at your goal." He looked at the toilet. He walked over to it. He stuck his fingers down his throat, and out came something, but then he noticed some blood came up to.

"Fuck, well I can't tell anyone can I." He stood up, and flushed the toilet. Walking back up the stairs he coughed a couple times. He looked at his hand. _Fuck, now I'm coughing up blood. _He ran to his room.

Ana Nervon began pestering with CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: HEy

AN: CG?

CG: I'M 84 POUNDS IF THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE ASKING AND I'VE VOMITED BLOOD, COUGHED SOME UP TO

AN: YOu idiot, don't vomit unless you've eaten something

CG: BUT THE COUGHING UP BLOOD

AN: SOme type of side effect, it's nothing

CG: I WAS FOUND OUT TODAY

AN: OH fucking seriously, you could've asked me on how to hide it

CG: WELL YOU FORGOT TO GIVE ME TIPS, BUT SHE PROMISED TO TELL NO ONE

AN: SHe will tell someone, they always do

CG: I THINK SHE LIKES ME

AN: GOod reason to be thin

CG: I GUESS, BUT STILL WHAT IF I HAVE TO BECOME FAT AGAIN

AN: IT"s been three years, your body will just reject the food, don't worry

CG: GOOD SOMEONE'S COMING, I HAVE TO GO

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering with Ana Nervon at 12:51 pm.

"Hey, Karkat." Karkat stared at the door.

"Fuck you want Sollux?"

"Uh, well it is time for lunch." Karkat cringed. He hated that place.

"Well, I'll come soon, tell the others I'm coming later."

"Ok, but plea2e come 2oon." Sollux then disappeared down the steps. _ How do I look like I'm eating again, but I won't. _he ran into the bathroom. There hung the cabinet that no one uses. He rummaged through there a bit.

"Diet pills, where the fuck are they." He soon found them hidden in the back. _These will help make sure what I do eat does not get turned to fat. _ He walked to the dining hall at 1:03.

"Karkat, you're late." Kanaya told him pointing to the clock.

" Sorry, I had to finish something."

"Well take a seat." Kanaya was eying the pills Karkat was crushing in his hand.

"If that's a diet pill, that boy's about dead." Karkat sprinkled the crushed pills onto the part of the food he was gonna eat.

"Karkat, have you heard from the kiid2 lately?" Karkat ate the couple leaves of lettuce in the salad he would allow himself, and then chewed slowly. He swallowed after taking exactly 30 bites.

"John pestered me this morning." Sollux nodded.

"Hey, ii heard Dave ha2n't pe2tered anyone lately."

"Well I haven't gotten a pester from Dave for at least 3 months." Karkat went to throw his plate away when Gamzee tugged at his sleeve pulling it up enough to reveal the scars. Karkat quickly pulled it down. He pulled it down too late Vriska pointed them out to him.

"Hey Karkat, what was with those fucking weird scars." He flinched again.

"Oh, um… they were done by a cat." Vriska nodded.

"If they were done by a cat, why does he insist on hiding them?" she thought.

"What did you want Gamzee?" Gamzee shook his head.

"I forgot." Karkat went on to dump his food. He said goodbye to everyone before leaving. Walking back to his room he coughed up more blood. _ Fuck, why do I keep coughing up blood. _ He opened the door to his room, and locked it when he walked inside. He looked at the wall.

"When did I start this shit, and why?"

**Next chapter will be a flashback.**


	4. Chapter 4: User: learn Karkat's past

**Thank you to Tailsdoll13 for your support, and remember stay strong. You can still be rescued, but me i can't be so don't try. Well here's Karkat's first real spiral into the disease. :)**

Karkat stared at his reflection, it's been 2 years since he started this (age 13, it's just now really taking off.) Ana had pestered him 2 years ago for the first time, and the chat is still floating around in his mind, engrained.

AN: HEy CG!

AN: CG?

CG: FUCK DO YOU WANT, I DON'T KNOW YOU.

AN: SOon you will

AN: I Can give you tips

CG: ON WHAT FUCKASS

AN: STaying )(thin)(

CG: LOOK, JUST BECAUSE I SPEND TIME ON THE COMPUTER, DOES NOT MEAN I'M FAT

AN: BUt the )(thin)( I'm talking about his protruding bones, legs like sticks, the )(thin)( that I'm talking about is the one you want

CG: WELL, SO I AM FAT?

AN: PRecisely

CG: FINE BE AN ASS

AN: I'M stating the truth

CG: WELL GUESS WHAT, I WON'T LISTEN

AN: THink about it, it'll make you happy

CG: MAYBE I WILL

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering Ana Nervon at 3:47 pm.

"She stated the truth that day, and the truth is what I need, being happy does mean being thin." He proceeded to check his weight so Ana could give him tips.

"104 pounds, fuck not nearly thin enough." He looked around the bathroom, and then rummaged through the cupboard. He soon found what he was looking for. He rolled up his sleeve, and slid the cold metal blade across his wrist. The blood fell a little, but it wasn't too deep. He grabbed a tissue, and wiped the blood away. He walked back to his room rolling his sleeve down. It was late, and Kanaya would kill him is he were late to breakfast. He just layed on his bd, and closed his eyes.

"Karkat, wake up, breakfa2t." Sollux was knocking on the door. _Fuck, no._

"Coming." He trudged downstairs still in his pajamas, and hair not combed.

"Hello Karkat." Nepeta smiled at him. He sat at his seat next to Nepeta, and Sollux. Karkat looked at the food.

"Should I spit or exercise?" He contemplated, then took a bite and spit into the cup. _This will fool everyone, and I won't gain any weight. _He spat all the food he ate into the cup, and then he excused himself.

"Where do you need to be?" Kanaya questioned him.

"Uh, well nowhere."

"Sit back down." She pointed to his seat, and the cup still full of food. Nepeta nudged him.

"Nice try, Karkitty." He rolled his eyes. Sollux looked at him.

"Where do you need to be so urgent." Karkat shrugged.

"Well maybe I have some work to do." Sollux laughed.

"Like what, being a crabby ass." Karkat gave Sollux the finger.

"No dumbass, maybe some real shit, like… um… oh well fuck it, something." The meal was soon over, and Karkat waited till everyone was done putting up their plate before doing so.

"Karkat, you finished your food." He smiled at Kanaya.

"Yeah." The cup was hidden from Kanaya's sight, and Karkat kept it hidden. He dumped the cup out in the sink before reaching his room. He stayed there, and pestered Ana that day. Nothing important, just the basic stuff. He ate half of his lunch, and spit the food during dinner. He went to bed at 11. The next few months were when his disorder really took off. 102, 100, 98, 97. The weight wasn't dropping as fast as he wanted, but it had just took off after about two years of Ana just setting his mind to an anorexic way of thinking. On his 14th birthday, (The age he's at now, I don't know how many sweeps so years will have to do.) Ana pestered the hell out of him.

Ana Nervon began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: KArkat, heard it's your birthday

CG: HOW'D YOU FUCKING HEAR ABOUT IT

AN: SOmeone told me a month ago

CG: WAIT, I FUCKING TOLD YOU

AN: YEs

CG: WHAT DID YOU REALLY WANT

AN: SInce there's gonna be food at your party, please take my advice and purge yourself

CG: HOW?

AN: TAke two fingers shove them to the back of your throat and watch the food come out of your mouth

CG: SOUNDS FUCKING EASY ENOUGH, SO TAKE MY TWO FINGERS SHOVE EM, AND THEN WATCH THE SHIT COME UP

AN: YEah, basically

AN: WEight?

CG: 97 POUNDS

AN: YOu could stand to lose another 20 or so, how's 77, or so?

CG: FUCKING FANTASTIC, OK BYE

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering Ana Nervon at 9:54 am.

"Hey Karkat, you ready for your biirthday?" Karkat groaned, but then he remembered all he had to do was stick two fingers down his throat and vomit. He smiled.

"Coming." He grabbed his jacket, putting the razor inside a pocket. _Maybe I'll eat too much. _Everyone waited for the honored troll to arrive, and he did. They jumped up throwing streamers.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY KARKAT!." He looked at the food that was on the table. _Cheese, bread, and the cake, everything will make me fat, so nothing. _He partied a little along with the others. The time came for his biggest challenge, the cake.

"Karkat take a bite we're all waiting." Karkat slowly took a bite, and chewed it. _ you can feel the fat on you grow, I think I should purge. _Nepeta tried to get Karkat to eat the rest.

"C'mon karkitty, you need to eat, please" So, to make Nepeta happy Karkat ate the slice. _Fuck. Fuck. FUCK. FUCK. FUCK, you ate it you fuckass, purge, purge it. _Karkat stood up, and ran around. People just thought he was partying. No. he was exercising. When the excitement died down, and it grew late everyone went back to their rooms, Karkat stood by the toilet. He bent down slowly, then knelt. His fingers sliding to the back of his throat. He coughed, and wretched a bunch, but soon he vomited, and then twice, three times. This was the downfall when Ana destroyed Karkat's confidence and life. This was it.


	5. Chapter 5: Kanaya: confront

**Flashback ends:**

"Hey, Karkat." Karkat put his pillow over his head.

"Go the fuck away Sollux." Sollux started opening the door.

"II just wanted to 2ay that we 2hould go to lunch." Karkat laid down on his bed.

"Tell Kanaya I'm not hungry." Sollux looked at him.

"C'mon, you look so thin, you should eat something." Karkat shook his head.

"I'm not going, I feel sick." Sollux then figured arguing is useless, and left. Kanaya stopped him at the door of the dining hall.

"Where's Karkat?"

"He told me he wasn't hungry." Kanaya just sighed.

"Go on in, I'll talk to him." Karkat was in his room, pillow over his head, and he sobbed. Kanaya knocked on the door.

"Karkat, can I come in." _fuck, fuck, fuck it's Kanaya, I thought I could hide it. _he sighed.

"Leave me the fuck alone," Kanaya started opening the door.

"GO AWAY, AND MIND YOUR OWN SHIT!" Kanaya walked in the door.

"Karkat tell me what's been going on." Karkat shook his head under the pillow.

"No." She grabbed the pillow.

"Karkat, please." He shook his head again.

"No." Karkat sat up. Kanaya grabbed his arm. He flinched.

"If you won't tell me what's wrong I'll find out myself, so please tell me," Karkat shook his head. Kanaya started rolling up his sleeve, revealing the cuts, scars, and burns. She ran her fingers over the cuts. Karkat looked away.

"Karkat, why?" karkat shrugged.

"Dunno." Kakaya looked at him with a look of disbelief.

"Karkat, tell me." He looked away again, and then at Kanaya who was sitting on his bed.

"Can't you tell, I'm a weak useless fuck." She then looked at Karkat's body.

"I knew it, Karkat please tell me why." Karkat grabbed his sleeve and pulled it down. He sat there legs crossed.

"Why do you care for me, I'm useless can't you see." Kanaya looked sad, Karkat just looked emotionless.

"Look Karkat, give me a decisive answer to the next few questions," Karkat rolled his eyes.

"How long have you been doing this? How much do you weigh at the moment? Has someone confronted you and if so, then who?" Karkat sighed.

"3 years maybe, 90 pounds, and yes Nepeta." Kanaya again had a look of disbelief.

"Karkat I need your real weight." _Damn it how did she know I lied. _

"Fine, 82 pounds." She looked at his legs, crossed over they were only bone, and it hurt her to see him like this.

"Why would you ever do this?" Karkat watched a tear fall from her face. He felt one fall from his own face.

"I've been bullied, I've been hurt, it's too much, I can't take it anymore." He grabbed Kanaya's sleeves, and started crying, no sobbing. Kanaya hugged him.

"Let it out, it's ok." Karkat wiped his eyes, and released himself from Kanaya's grip.

"Will you make me stop this?" She shook her head.

"I can't make you stop it, but if you need someone to talk to I'll be here." She left after that. **POV change to Kanya.**

" Why didn't I try to stop him while I had the chance." The poor kid's gonna die if he continues. I shook my head. "If he collapses then I can get him the help he needs. Karkat has been confronted by Nepeta, hm." I walk to Nepeta's room, and knock on the door. She opens it.

"Hey Kanaya." I see her eyes hit the ground.

"May I talk to you about something?" She nodded.

"Karkat?" I nod back.

"Yeah." I walk into the small room of her's. the shipping wall, het computers and her bed. I sit in the chair, while she sits on the bad.

"Did you confront him?"

Yeah." Nepeta looked nervous.

"You told no one."

"No."

"Why?" she put her hands on her knees.

"He told me not to." I looked Nepeta in the eyes.

"If you knew earlier we could've saved him before it got out of hand, but now he's at 82 pounds and a walking stick."

"I know." She was whispering.

"Well it's too late now, he can't be saved, unless he gets help." I look over at Nepeta, she was going to cry. I put my hand on her shoulder.

"Nepeta, don't cry, it's ok." She wiped her tears, and then grabbed her sleeve.

"I need to show you something." She rolled up her own sleeves on her jacket. It revealed her first couple cuts." I look over them, and run my finger over them.

"Nepeta, why would you start to.' She sighed. 

"I couldn't stand seeing Karkat like this, and I thought maybe if I do to myself what he's done I'll shove his problems on me, and maybe he can stop knowing he's not alone, and I thought I could understand him if I knew how it felt." I looked at her. I'm surprised, sympathy symptoms. Those are rare, and of all people Nepeta's having them.

"We'll help Karkat through this, and with that if it goes full-blown with you we'll help you to, you're never alone." Nepeta smiled at me.

"Thanks, and don't worry I'll stop." I hope she does, I really do.

** Back to 3****rd**** person POV**

Karkat stared at the wall. _God fucking damn it, Kanaya knows, she'll send me to a hospital like tomorrow, I know she will. _He looked at the razor sitting behind his computer. He got up, and grabbed it. his computer lit up.

Ana Nervon began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: HEy

CG: WHAT DO YOU FUCKING WANT

AN: PRogress

CG: 82 POUNDS, AND ANOTHER CONFRONTATION

AN: OK seriously, you need to hide it better

CG: GUESS WHAT, I DO, I'VE BEEN HIDING IT FOR THE PAST THREE FUCKING YEARS

AN: HOw'd they find out

CG: ROLLING MY FUCKING SLEEVE UP

AN: OH so that's a little different, I though you showed your body, or purged without the water running

CG: NO, I'M NOT THAT STUPID

AN: GOod job on the progress, now just a little more

CG: SEE YOU

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering Ana Nervon at 2:12 pm.

Karkat lay on his bed, breathing slowly and evenly, but his heart was too slow for his breathing, so it slowed and shallowed. Karkat sighed and soon fell asleep. He awoke to Sollux knocking on his door.

"Diinner." Karkat grumbled and got up.

"Coming." The door flung open. They walked to the hall and Kanaya stopped Karkat, but Sollux was allowed past.

"Karkat, are you going to eat anything." He looked annoyed.

"Probably not, so don't bother me about it," She sighed.

"If you collapse for any reason, you're going straight to a hospital, got that." He looked really shocked.

"Why?" Kanaya looked again at him with disbelief.

"Look, you're a stick with scars and bruises everywhere, why would I not care." He shrugged.

"Cuz I'm not worth it." Kanaya lifted the young boy's chin.

"You are Karkat, and don't ever say you aren't because you are." She left him at that and he sat next to Sollux, not touching his food.

"Plea2e Karkat, ju2t eat one fuckiing thiing." Karkat shook his head.

"I feel sick."

"C'mon, ju2t one thiing, one."

"NO SOLLUX, NOW STOP FUCKING BOTHERING ME!" Karkat dumped his plate, and sat down. Sollux now saw Karkat haad a problem, and it was a dangerous problem.

"You're going to kill yourself if you continue down this path." Karkat shrugged, and laid his head down on the table.

"Who gives a shit about me?" Sollux whipped his head, so his eyes met Karkat's.

"I do, Nepeta does, Kanaya does, everyone does." Karkat laid his head in his hands.

"You're just saying that, you don't care." Karkat kept his head down for the rest of the meal. He ran back to his room, and there was a message.

TurntechGodhead began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

TG: Karkat?

TG: can I tell you something

TG: please

TG: you there?

CG: FUCK OFF

TG: wow, I thought I could trust you

CG: WOW DUDE, I WAS BEING FUCKING SARCASTIC

TG: oh, um sorry, so can I tell you?

CG: DO YOU REALLY WANT ME TO KNOW YOUR FANTASTIC SECRET

TG: yes

CG: OK TELL ME

TG: uh, well…

TG: oh forget it

CG: I'LL TELL YOU MY SECRET IF YOU TELL ME YOUR'S

TG: you have a secret?

CG: YES, IS THAT A FUCKING PROBLEM

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering TurntechGodhead at 7:12 pm.

TG: I just wanted to say (promise to tell no one): I cut my own arm because my emotions don't show, and I cry, scream, and laugh on my arm.

Karkat stared at the text, and read it again, and again. _Dave, why would you go into the hell I'm living, please stop soon. _Karkat got looked at the clock, it was 7 and he had nothing to do, so for the first time in weeks he got up and walked to the living room type place this "house" had. Vriska, Terezi, Eridan, and Gamzee were there. Karkat sighed, and opened the door. Everyone stared at him, but he went and layed on the couch in front of the TV, watching Vriska own Eridan at some shooting game. They laughed, and they smiled. He thought hearing Eridan cuss out Vriska was funny, and he tried to laugh. He couldn't, it was impossible. He found himself scratching his arm, and he continued.

"Hey, Karkat," He sat up.

"Wanna play a round with Terezi?" He looked at Vriska.

"Can Terezi play." Gamzee nodded out of a corner.

"Yeah, I heard she was really good to."

"Wow, that's really cool." He grabbed the controller, and looked at the screen." _Think that the enemies are food, and food is bad remember. _ He kept remembering that, and killed many people, but Terezi killed hundreds more. _Damn she's fucking amazing. _He threw a fake smile at Vriska.

"Y'know, I think I'll just sit here, and watch." Vriska shrug.

"Be my guest." Karkat lays on the couch, and after a couple hours of watching he fell asleep. Nepeta flew in.

"Karkat!... oh he fell asleep." She picked him, and carried his weightless body to his room. She looked at his computer. There was a pester from Ana. She walked over and read it.

Ana Nervon began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: HEy karkat?

AN: YOu never respond on time

AN: OK tell me your weight, and I'll give you more tips.

That's all Nepeta had to read to know the cause.

"Oh god, so that's how this mess happened. Karkat listened to some troll on Trollian tell him lies." She whispered under her breath. She walked out of his room. She walked to Karkat's favorite place, and cried. **Didn't expect that huh. Well thanks for your support, it means a lot to know someone cares. I may never get better or I may start getting better in a week, who knows, but right now i really am far from repair. I couldn't think of anything for this chapter, so this should work.**


	6. Chapter 6: AN: try to kill Karkat

**So Nepeta's having sympathy symptoms, she's not gonna go full-blown, and Dave has borderline personality disorder. He'll maybe come up later. Just forget about those two for now.**

Karkat woke up, and looked at the clock. It was 3:34 pm.

"Well it's late again." He hadn't eaten in the past week, and he felt dizzy. _Fuck, if Kanaya finds out I collapsed, I'll be sent to a hospital, shit. _He locked his door, and smiled. _Kanaya can't find me in my room. _He laid on his bed, covers over his face. He was freezing, and it would never get warm no matter how hard he tried. He started to cry, and then sob. He was loud, and Terezi walked by. He heard a knock.

"Karkat, you ok?"

"GO THE FUCK AWAY KANAYA!"

"It's Terezi."

"Fuck you want?"

"Are you ok."

"I'm fine." Terezi rolled her eyes.

"If you say so." She walked away. _Why the fuck do people care about me, I'm so far from repair they should just give up. _He slowly got up from his bed, and walked to the computer.

ArsenicCatnip began pestering CarcinoGeneticist:

AC: 33 : Hey Karkitty, you awake yet?

AC: 33: really Karkitty, get up.

CG: WHY DID YOU TROLL ME AGAIN?

AC: 33: Kanaya asked where you were at breakfast today

CG: TELL HER I WAS SLEEPING

AC: 33: are you serious, or are you lying

CG: I'M TELLING THE TRUTH, THE DEAD FUCKING TRUTH

AC: 33: Are you really telling the truth?

CG: YES, I FELL ASLEEP, AND JUST NOW FUCKING GIOT UP

AC: 33: I'll tell Kanaya, and she'll see what she'll do with you

CG: GO DO THAT, I'LL BE ASLEEP

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering ArsenicCatnip at 3:46 pm.

Karkat sighed.

"I wish that this hell would just kill me off, it's just torturing me, please Ana kill me now." He felt an unexpected tear fall from his face. He wiped it off, and leaned back in his chair. Kanaya knocked on the door.

"Fuck, just come in Kanaya, I don't care, let this kill me." She walked in with a sad look in her eyes.

"Karkat, don't say that. You are needed as much as the rest, if you let this kill you we won't have you, and if we don't have you there will an empty seat at the table, an empty bedroom, and many empty hearts. Looking at your empty room will make us cry, seeing your empty seat will make us remember this pain we're all feeling right now. Our hearts will be empty, and we'll all feel lost. You're needed Karkat, we all need you." Karkat was crying by the time that ended, and Kanaya put her hands on his.

"Let their hearts be empty, I don't care, my heart is lost and empty right now, my heart is broken beyond repair." Kanaya threw her arms around his body.

"Karkat, don't say that. You're needed just as much as everyone else, don't say that." Karkat grabbed Kanaya's arm.

"You don't know how it feels, you never will, it hurts, it hurts you and everyone around you, it hurts your body, and every step! It hurts your heart to see yourself die slowly! You feel the need to continue because it's become your normal life, and you're lost without it!." Kanaya released her hug. Karkat was choking on his sobs again and again.

"Karkat calm down, it's ok, you don't need to feel lost. You are never lost or alone. We are here, all of us. Please just stop," Kanaya was letting tears fall, she couldn't hide her sorrow any longer.

"I'll still stick to my promise though, if you collapse anywhere, I'm taking you to the hospital on the spot." Karkat nodded.

"Ok." He whispered to her. Barely audible, the noise made Kanaya smile, karkat did have hope in him. She touched his hand one more time, and then left. Karkat went back over to his bed, and fell asleep again. He slept another day (you've had those days right, where you just sleep.), and at 11:03 in the morning he woke up. He hadn't eaten for over a week, and wasn't planning to. He laid in his bed, and stared at the wall. _What if I collapse today, I'll be sent to some place, and they'll make me fat again, shit. _He got up after a while, and went to the bathroom. He had stepped a foot into the bathroom, when a his phone vibrated.

Ana Nervon has pestered CarcinoGeneticist:

AN: HEy I haven't heard from you in over a week, just wanted to see that you didn't die

CG: I'M STILL FUCKING ALIVE, BUT IF I COLLAPSE KANAYA IS GOING TO SEND ME TO THE HOSPITAL FUCKINF ASAP

AN: That's really not good

CG: I'M FUCKING USED TO IT

AN: OH yeah, you're weight

CG: I'M IN THE BATHROOM, I'LL CHECK

AN: COol

CG: 79 POUNDS

AN: SO you've lost a good amount, another 5 pounds ok

CG: YEAH, I'LL MANAGE ANOTHER 5, BUT I HAVEN'T EATEN IN A WEEK

AN: NIce, keep it that way

CG: IF I COLLAPSE

AN: IF you feel you're going to collapse, just eat something small

Ana Nervon ceased pestering CarcinoGeneticist at 11:11 am.

"I won't eat, I feel so accomplished that I haven't eaten in 7 days, I won't break that." He walked back to his room, and waited for Sollux to get him for lunch. Sure enough at 11: 48 he knocked.

"Hey Karkat, lunch." Karkat groaned, and got up.

"Fine, coming." He walked with Sollux down the stairs, and sat at his spot.

"Good to have ya back, did you sleep for days again." Karkat nodded.

"Yeah, I did." Gamzee laughed.

"How do you sleep for motherfucking 2 days straight?" Karkat shrugged.

"Dunno, but I can, so it's possible." Karkat felt dizzy, and the fact that he hadn't eaten wasn't helping. He leaned forward a little. _Fuck, not now, not while everyone's watching, no! _He tried to stop it, but it was too late, he had collapsed.

"Karkat!." **Thanks again for the support, it means so much to know someone cares. Again, Dave is suffering form borderline, and self-harm is a symptom of borderline. Nepeta's having sympathy symptoms and won't do it again. This chapter started out so close, but soon it evolved. Karkat can sleep for days, it's not impossible, and he's trying to avoid eating by sleeping. **


	7. Chapter 7: Nepeta Confess

"Karkat! Can you hear me?" Karkat's eyes slightly opened. _Fuck, I'm in a hospital. _

"I can hear you, but I don't want to hear you." Karkat looked around, Nepeta, Sollux, Vriska, everyone else was there, but this place was in the human world.

"Karkat, why? Why would you try to destroy yourself?" Karkat shrugged.

"Why am I in the human world?." Kanaya looked sternly at him.

"There are no hospitals on Alternia, and you wouldn't have made it if you stayed so I somehow found a way to get you here, I found a portal that goes from Alternia to the human world." The door opened with a creak

"Hello, you must be Karkat." Karkat turned his head.

"What do you want fuckass?" The doctor walked closer, ignoring Karkat's words.

"My name is Simon Hartzler, but you can call me Dr. Hartzler." Karkat mumbled something under his breath, and crossed his arms.

"Are you here to fuck my life up more than it is by sending me to a fucking asylum?" Simon shook his head.  
'No, I'm here to save you from this." Karkat sighed.

"So you're gonna make you a fat fucking piece of shit again." Simon looked at Karkat's body.

"No, I'm here to help you get better."

"So you're gonna make me fat again."

"No, I'm here to help you become healthy again."

"Stop talking to me like I'm a fucking kid, I'm 14 for fuck's sake, geez." Simon sat down in the chair next to Karkat's bed.

"Look, Karkat, if you want to live then you sometime have to restore what you've lost."

"Then let me die if that's the case." Simon excused himself to talk to the others.

"Karkat is in dire need of help, and here at the hospital we can't do that, we can only restore his weight, but he'll only lose it again." Kanaya clenched her fist to stop from crying.

"So what do we do?' Simon sighed.

"Send him to a clinic that treats these things." Feferi and Terezi looked at each other.

"What does karkat even have?" Simon looked at them sternly.

"He has a disorder called Anorexia Nervosa." Feferi sighed.

"I knew it, I knew it from the beginning."

"Then why didn't you tell me." Feferi shrugged.

"I was too scared to tell you." Simon cleared his throat.

"As I was saying, he is at an extremely low weight. It's low enough that he could drop down dead any second. You're lucky he's still alive right now, you're extremely lucky right now." Nepeta was crying, her hands buried into her face.

"I was the first one to confront him, I should've told Kanaya, but I was terrified." Simon nodded.

"That's quite normal, don't worry about it, main thing is he's safe now." Nepeta smiled despite her tears.

"So, where are you going to send him?"  
"We'll either send him to a clinic that specializes in eating disorders, or a clinic that treats mental disorders."

"Which one would you recommend?" Simon got his clipboard.

"I would recommend this one." He pointed to a spot on the paper.

"Cobblestone Road to Recovery, sounds interesting." **Sorry, I literally spent 10 minutes on the name and could only think of this one, my naming ability is at zero. **

"Yes, the clinic is known for helping everyone that comes there with their problem in almost no time at all, a couple months maximum." Kanaya agreed.

"Sounds good, but he will persist, just warning you." Simon looked at the room.

"He's not allowed to do that, oh and do you even know how much he weighs?" kanaya shook her head.

"No, we don't track that."

"Not many people do, but this may be a shock to you," All trolls braced themselves, ready for a schock.

"We found his weight to be at 78 pounds, and his BMI at 13.8, 5 percentiles lower than it should be he could drop dead any minute." Kanaya sat down next to Nepeta to comfort the crying troll.

"Look, he'll be ok, he'll live, don't worry." Nepeta hugged Kanaya.

"What if he doesn't, what if he dies." Kanaya ran her hand over Nepeta's back in a comforting way. ** I remember when my mom did that, it really helped. **

"Karkat's strong, he won't die, he'll fight to get better, there's a spark in him I know it." Nepeta looked at Kanaya with sad eyes.

"Kanaya, please help Karkat. Please." Kanaya hugged Nepeta again.

"I will, we all will."

"Who'll tell this to Karkat?" Kanaya stood up, Nepeta still in her arms.

"I will, and Nepeta will come with me." Simon smiled.

"I sense she has feelings for Karkat." Nepeta looked at him, the sadness still in her eyes.

"I do." She whispered.

"Waiit, II'm coming to!"

"Sollux! Well come with us." The rest were trying to hold back tears, and none dared to see Karkat in this state, it scared them. The door opened.

"Go the fuck away , I don't need you." Kanaya walked in with her arm over Nepeta and Sollux by her side.

"Hey." She smiled.

"Kanaya, what shit do you want to say today?' She sat down in the chair, the others stood there.

"I'm here to tell you something important." Karkat sighed.

"I'm going somewhere to get help right." Kanaya nodded. Karkat started digging hs nails into his skin for rage.

"Fuck you, fuck doctors, fuck all this, just fuck it all." Kanaya looked at karkat's body, he had a hospital gown on, and a bracelet, the bracelet that declared him an anorexic.

"Leave Kanaya, I don't need you." Nepeta looked at Karkat with sad eyes.

"Karkat, Nepeta wants to talk to you alone." Nepeta looked at Kanaya with terror. Kanaya left. Nepeta sighed.

"I wrote you a letter." She slid it to Karkat's side. He picked it up, and opened it.

Karkat,

If this is your last day with me then I must tell you some things, I must tell you secrets I've kept. Please don't hate me for any of these, maybe these'll help, but if you do not make it I'll make sure our time together is spent well. I will tell you this Karkat, for years I've had a little crush on you, and if I can't see you anymore at least you'll remember that I cared. :33 Karkat, please remember you're never alone, please remember you've always got me as a friend, maybe as more than a friend. I hope this won't be the last time we see each other, I hope you'll accept this. Karkat will you be my matesprit?

:33 : Nepeta leijon **I know Nepeta was OOC, but it happens, and I ship KatNep in this so… yeah…**

Karkat looked at Nepeta, then he stood up, walked over to her, and hugged her.

"Nepeta, I will." **I had to do something with the shipping feels I had today, sorry if it disappointed you. Sorry. You guys are really kind to me so thank you! :33. Thank you for your support. Yeah sorry again if this chapter disappointed you.**


	8. Chapter 8: Karkat meet a friend

Kanaya knocked on the door.

"Hey Nepeta, what's taking so long?" Karkat sat back down on his bed.

"Sorry, I was just spending time with a good friend." Nepeta smiled, and walked out of the room. She was glad Karkat accepted her. Kanaya saw Nepeta smile.

"We still need to take Karkat today." Kanaya opened the door.

"Hello Karkat." Karkat grumbled something and crossed his arms.

"You're here to tell me something more than just hey aren't you?" Kanaya nodded.

"Look Karkat, if you don't get help soon you'll die, and so it has to happen now." Karkat sighed.

"I fucking hate you Kanaya." She looked at him again.

"You're going to a rehab clinic in 2 hours, pack your stuff." Karkat wanted to scream, but he knew it wouldn't help, it never does, so he scratched at his skin. Simon walked in.

"Karkat, did Kanaya tell you."

"Yes." Karkat sounded annoyed, and he was. He just wanted Ana to stop bothering him, that's all he wanted, but she didn't she continued. That's the reason he was here, a bully.

"Kanaya packed your bag for you, she said she packed your phone, some clothes, your laptop and some other stuff." Karkat just stared at the wall.

"Leave me alone."

"You need to come, they're leaving now." Karkat stood up; his legs were almost to weak to hold him. He walked ignoring the stares from the other patients. They arrived at the bus where Kanaya had his bag.

"Get in, we're leaving soon." Karkat looked at his hospital gown.

"You can change when you get there." Karkat looked to find Nepeta. She waved.

"We'll be staying at a hotel or something." Karkat just stared out the window.

"Karkat, something wrong?" Karkat wanted to just yell at her, but he couldn't.

"Wel, I'm being sent to a fucking stupid rehab center against my will, and then they'll make me fat again, my worst fear." Nepeta hugged him.

"It's ok Karkat, better than if you were to die.' Karkat loved the warm feel Nepeta gave him. He hugged her.

"You're warm." She smiled.

"You looked really cold." He smiled.

"Hopefully you can visit." Nepeta smiled.

"Yeah." Karkat fell asleep in her arms.

"So he was tired." Soon they arrived, and Karkat got his bag. Everyone said bye one by one, and then Kanaya walked in with Karkat.

"Name."

"Karkat Vantas."

"Problem."

"Anorexia."

"Proceed, you are registered." Kanaya hugged Karkat.

"Please don't die on us, we'll hope everyday." Kanaya released Karkat. He watched Nepeta wave to him from the window. He waved back. _Someday, I will get better, even if I don't want to. It'll happen even if I don't want it. _A nurse walked to him.

"Hello my name is Laura, I'll be your nurse for the next couple months." Karkat looked at her. She had a kind face like Nepeta's, and she had brown hair that was long, very long. She was tall and thin, Karkat liked that.

"Is there anywhere I can fucking change." She nodded.

"Yes, over there are bathrooms, but I have to come with to make sure you don't purge. Karkat sighed.

"Fine." He walked over to the bathrooms, and changed into some grey skinny jeans, a t-shirt with his logo on it, and a black hoodie. Shoes were not allowed. Laura walked with him to a room.

"This will be your room for the next couple months." Karkat looked at it. A bed, it had white sheets, and a desk and chair by the window. A door led to the bathroom. Karkat put his bag on the bed. He walked out, the rooms were circled and the light was bright, it felt nice. There was a door to outside in between rooms. People were sitting there. A girl sat in the chair, she had bandages around her arms. A boy was scribbling things on paper, and there was a girl in the corner, she looked thin, but not as thin as him.

"Hey new kid." A boy asked, he had blonde hair and sunglasses, a red long-sleeved shirt and bandages around his arms and legs.

"Fuck you want?" The boy had his arms crossed.

"Your name's Karkat right?" Karkat looked astonished.

"Yeah, how'd you know that?" The boy just smiled.

"I just do,?" _fuck is this Dave?_

"What's your fucking name?"

"Name's Dave." _I knew it, this is Dave. _

"You pestered me right." Dave nodded.

"I did." Karkat sat down next to Dave.

"You've got borderline." Dave nodded.

"I do, you?" Karkat flinched.

"Anorexia." A girl spoke.

"Hey new kid." Karkat looked over.

"What do you want." She smiled.

"Your name, I know a Karkat." He looked at her.

"Name's Ana, and you're presumably Karkat." Karkat nodded. _This can't be the girl who caused my anorexia, she can't be. _Karkat walked over catiously.

"Are you the person who ruined my life." She looked at her nails.

"Who's that?" Karkat wanted to punch her.

"Ana Nervon." She flinched, and her eyes grew wide.

"I may be, but why would I have ruined your life, I thought I helped." Karkat looked down.

"No, you're the reason I'm here, you're the reason all this happened." Ana tilted her head, and filed her nails.

"I needed a buddy, I've been here for three years, and no newcomer had anorexia so I had to make one, you." Karkat wanted to scream.

"Why the fuck would you ruin someone else's perfectly fine life so that you can have a buddy." She laughed.

"Is it really that hard to understand." Karkat wanted to punch her, and her smug little smile.

"Yes, it is hard to understand." She chuckled again.

"Geez, you're persistent, well I wanted a friend, so I pestered a random person which turned out to be you, and now you're under my control, I control you now. You should've realized that." Karkat grumbled.

"Well why the fuck would you even try to ruin someone's life, it's not like it'll make your life better."

"Oh but it did, it did at least when I found out my plan worked." Ana crossed her arms.

"Now if you'll leave me alone, I'm kinda busy, I'll talk to you later." Karkat walked away. _Damn her, if she's really Ana Nervon I'll kill her, she was the one who brought me here, her words brought me to this place, so why does she act like it's not a big deal. Fuck her and her pompous mug. _**XD omg! I heard little Edward Elric say that to Mustang, and I wanted to try! **

"Karkat, you need to come over." Laura waved and smiled.

"Fuck." Karkat slumped over.

"How did your first day go with them?" Karkat shrugged.

"It was ok I guess." She laughed.

"It'll get better, it always does, and it's dinner. " Karkat cringed. _Fuck. I knew that was going to happen, now I'll become fat again._

"Do I have to eat everything?" Laura shook her head.

"No, unless you can, because right now your body doesn't know how to handle food, we're even thinking of putting you on a drip, we'll see how you handle dinner." Karkat cringed. _Fuck, this place, they're just motherfucking jealous._

"Hey, Karkat." Dave walked by, hands in his pocket.

"Fuck you want."

"You don't want to be late, you'll get a day added, no one wants that." Karkat ran to follow Dave.

"Fuck." They walked downstairs and into a big room with lots of tables, each one had a name, and was set. Karkat sat next to Dave and he sat next to Ana. There were so many others.

"Wow, how many are here?" Dave shrugged.

"Most of these people here are the ones who don't need so much care, but the ones on top need more care, like you and me." Karkat looked at Dave's plate, the knife was missing.

"Dave, why's your knife missing?" He pointed to his arms. Karkat nodded.

"You have a different plate than all of us, it's smaller because you can't stomach as much food yet right?" Karkat shrugged.

"I guess, but if I can't stomach this, then I'll be put on a fucking drip." Dave sat down..

"I heard those are crap." _They probably are. _Karkat looked at Ana.

"Karkat, can you even eat food anymore?" Karkat shrugged again.

"I don't know, I haven't eaten in a week or so." Ana smiled.

"I hadn't heard from you in days, so I assumed you were committed or something." Karkat nodded.

"I collapsed." Ana smiled.

"That happens, heard you slept for days." Karkat picked up his fork.

"I did, I tried to make sure I wouldn't collapse." Ana ate something.

"You still collapsed." Karkat ate a piece of bread.

"Yeah, oh well when I get home I can start again." Karkat felt nauseous. _Fuck, this is bad. _Karkat looked horrible, and then he vomited. Laura walked over.

"I guess you can't handle solid food yet. Well tomorrow we'll attach you to a drip, sorry." She cleaned it up, and led Karkat to his room. He sat there and cried. Laura had left him for the night. He fell asleep soon after. Ana laughed.

"Just look at the boy, he's dead, might as well let him die."

**To you yaoi fans: I'm writing a JohnxDave right now, if you want yaoi it'll be in there. :). Again you guys are amazing, and this chapter is just sbout his first day in rehab so yeah... hope ya like it! :) :)**


	9. Chapter 9: Karkat: learn

**Thank you again to all your support, and XD! to Tailsdoll13 and Tsumi you guys are so kind to this chapter is basically introducing some characters, sorry if it disappoints you. If you want to feel better have Sollux: ^^o-o^^ - Sollux Captor :) There's some hinted DaveKat, but they'll just be morails. Karkat's a little OOC by learning the dance. The real reason will come later in the story :) Again sorry if the chapter disappoints you.**

Laura knocked on his door the next morning.

"Karkat, you have to wake up." Karkat grumbled and sat on the side of his bed. He still had the bracelet they attached in the hospital, the proof he had anorexia. He stood up and got dressed in the same grey jeans and he threw on a blue t-shirt with his symbol on it. He put on the slippers they gave him, and his jacket. Laura walked in.

"Did I fucking say you could come in." She shook her head.

"You did not, but you have to come." Karkat sat on his bed.

"Why?" She grabbed his arm.

"Weight check, and you're getting the food drip attached." He stayed there, and wouldn't budge.

"I won't move if it means I'll get fat again, the food will make me fat." Laura picked him up, then dropped him to his feet.

"The doctor said if you don't cooperate I'm allowed to use force, now just come with me." Karkat sighed.

"Fine fuckass." She took his hand and led him to the room with all the others.  
"Karkat's here." Dave was last in line.

"Dude, you're late." Karkat scowled.

"I've never woken up this early before, and why do you need a weight check, you're not anorexic or bulimic?" Dave shrugged.

"To make sure I'm eating." Dave was next.

"Dave Strider, please step forward." The doctor tapped his pen against his clipboard. He motioned Dave to get on. Dave stepped on and watched the counters balance.

"119 pounds, still healthy. You are free to roam." Dave smiled.

"Karkat Vantas, get on." Ana was watching from the door, she was grinning.

"78 pounds, severely underweight, oh and you're the kid who needs to be attached to a feeding tube, follow me." Karkat followed him while whispering profanities, and a lot of them. There was a small device, and a tube with the name "Karkat".

"What we first need to do is attach the tube, and then you put in the amount of calories you need. The tube will drip them into your body, right now we'll slowly build up the amount, I figure you've eaten nothing for a while am I right?" Karkat nodded.

"You are right I haven't eaten in 2 weeks." The doctor typed in an amount and sat Karkat down.

"I've set it at 300 calories and we'll add 100 everyday until you're at 1,800 for I fear 2,000 may be too much for your body to take after these I believe 3 years." Karkat nodded, and the doctor drew a dot where the tube will go. In Karkat's arm.

"This may hurt, I'm attaching the tube." He stuck the tube to Karkat's arm and then he made a small incision in his arm and stuck the tube into it. His arm was dripping a little blood, Karkat tried to enjoy every moment of the pain, and he did.

"Almost done, doin' ok?" Karkat nodded.

"Fucking absolutely fine." The doctor finished a little later.

"You've got group therapy at 11 am to 12 am, at 12 am is lunch, and now you may go to breakfast,. At 4 pm you have separate therapy in the garden, at 6:30 pm is dinner, at 9 pm is curfew and at 10 pm is lights out. From 7 am to 11 am you have free time, and at 12 am to 4 pm is free time, at 4 pm to 6:30 pm you take some type of art, we do this so you learn to use better coping methods. From 6:30 pm to 9 pm you may take another class, Dance, music, writing and crafting."

"I'll do… I guess I'll do music." The doctor nodded.

"Now you have breakfast, but after that you're free to roam, you're group therapy room is room 212, second floor. You may go." Karkat stood up, and walked out. He walked down to breakfast. Dave waved.

"Bro, meet me in garden after breakfast." Karkat sat down next to Dave.

"Why?" Dave had finished his food by the time Karkat walked in.

"I need to show you something." Karkat nodded.

"I'll come." Karkat sat there watching the others until breakfast was over. When breakfast was over he walked to the garden and waited for Dave.

"Hey, what took your ass so long to get out here?" Dave walked over.

"They wouldn't let us go… again." Karkat sat in a chair, tapping his foot.

"So what did you want to show me?" Dave smiled.

"A coping method we call dance." Karkat grumbled.

"You fucking kidding me?" Dave shook his head.

"Nope, it really helps." Karkat made a "yeah, really" face.

"Wow, so you want to teach me?"

"Yep, it's simple, and I got through my first week with dancing. I could show my emotions a bit more afterward, it helped." Karkat rolled his eyes.

"Fine, I'll learn this dance of yours." Dave clapped his hands together.

"Let's get started." Dave showed Karkat the dance. Karkat saw things he could do, like a turn and jump, but somewhere in the middle there was a flip." _Fuck, why am I doing this. He's my friend, so I don't want to disappoint him. _

"Dude I can't motherfucking flip." Dave laughed.

"You'll learn my friend, I'll teach you the beginning today." Karkat got up, and walked over. _I guess there's no way out, I have to learn. Fine, so be it I'll learn this fucking dance; It'll make Dave happy. _

"Hey, uh… are you sure I'm allowed to do this? I mean I don't know if I'm allowed to actually exercise, y'know anorexia and all." Dave nodded.

"They allow it, but not too much." Karkat nodded.

"So I guess we get started." Dave stood with his feet together and started with a kick and the he jumped to two feet.

"You try, it's not hard." Karkat kicked his leg and jumped. Dave clapped.

"Good you do that three times, and then you do this." Dave did a slid to the right, then left, then right again. He did a quarter turn, put his hand on his shoulders and did a half turn.

"Wow, can you show me again, I really can't do this, I am pretty much useless." Dave shook his head.

"Bro, you can dance like everyone else. Don't worry." Karat watched as Dave showed him the part again. _This is so fucking weird, but I kinda like it, it's weird. It takes my mind off of my pain. _

"Ok, don't laugh I'll try." Karkat did the second part of the dance with few mistakes. By the time he learned the part he knew flawlessly it was 11.

"The time went by fast, we have to go to group therapy." Karkat sat down out of breath.

"Wow, how do you dance for so fucking long?" Dave shrugged.

"I practice hours on end, and everyday." Karkat stood up again.

"Well, I got to go to room 212." Dave grabbed his ipod and walked to room 219. Karkat walked to room 212. He opened the door shaking.

"Hello Karkat, you're a little late." Karkat sat down and slumped.

"Seriously, why do you fucking care, I'm far from repair, you should just leave me." The leader of the group closed the door.

"Even if you are far from repair we can help you, there's always hope in a time of darkness, you just need to find it." She led Karkat to his seat.

"Fuckass." He whispered under his breath.

"I'm Natalie, I'll lead the group today." Everyone said hi, and then they started. A young girl, about 10 went first.

"I'm Alice, and I'm bipolar." Karkat looked at the others in his group he was searching for other anorexics. He found none.

"My name is Erika, I have multiple personalities." Natalie pointed to Karkat.

"Fine, I'm Karkat and I'm anorexic." Natalie nodded. The rest introduced themselves, an OCD, an Anxiety, a self-harmer. They were all suffering, but from different things. Karkat remembered the warm feel Nepeta gave and longed for it again, he wanted out.

"Anyone want to start?" Erika raised her hand.

"I would very much so." Natalie smiled.

"Go ahead." Erika sighed.

"I have 2 personalities, Alyne and Cara. Alyn is depressed and Cara is always happy. I never know when one will come out, it scares me." Natalie nodded.

"Good, anyone else want to go? If not I'll choose." No one raised their hand.

"How about you, Karkat." Karkat stood up.

"Fine, I haven't eaten in the past 2 weeks, but I didn't fear death for my only fear is gaining weight." Karkat sat back down. The hour went fast, and Karkat said nothing of Ana. Everyone talked openly, but Karkat didn't, he was scared. When he was done he walked to Dave who was waiting outside.

"How was it?"

"Fucking horrible, she asks so many personal questions, it's scary." Dave laughed.

"You had Natalie right?" Karkat nodded.

"Yeah." Dave chuckled.

"She does that, but if it gets too personal, just stop answering."

"I fucking stopped after she asked if I have a girlfriend." Dave started walking toward the dining hall.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" Karkat nodded.

"Yeah, her name's Nepeta Leijon." Dave opened the door to the hall.

"Cool." Karkat sat down next to Ana.

"Hey Karkat after lunch meet me in the front foyer, we need to talk."

"Why fuckass?" Ana shrugged, and tilted her head slightly.

"A couple questions."


	10. Chapter 10: Mutant

**Sorry it took so long to update, I've been busy with my cosplay, conventions, and gymnastics. Here is chapter 10 and to i'm-not-only-crazy: I tried to get more creative with swearing, but I'm no good at it :). You guys are amazing for reading this thing. :3**

Karkat walked down to the foyer.

"Hey asshole, you wanted to see me." She sat down.

"Yep, I had some questions for you." Karkat sat next to her.

"Shoot em at me." She nodded and turned toward him.

"First do you have any special person, as you trolls call it: a matesprit?" Karkat nodded.

"Yeah, Nepeta Leijon, why?" She shrugged.

"I'm just a little curious." Karkat crossed his arms.

"Wow, ask me more I'm so fucking interested in your damn questions." She heard the sarcasm in his voice.

"Look, I am your friend, you can trust me." Karkat grunted.

"No I can't you fucking ruined my damn life." She looked at him.

"Karkat is it true you are a mutant?" Karkat got up and walked away. Ana smiled.

"So you are a mutant." He just slammed his door to his room. She looked at herself and punched.

"Why did I ask that, I ruined our friendship forever now." Karkat rummaged his secret pocket in his bag, a pocket only he can open and got out the razor hidden in there.

_I promised Kanaya I would get better, but I'm getting worse. She'll kill me, slice me, dice me. Just like I do to myself. _He put the razor to his wrist and started to make an incision. He carved a deep cut in the shape of the word "mutant" into his arm. The cut bled a lot. It was deep and Karkat was sure he hit a vein. He let the blood drip for a while. A knock was heard.

"Karkat, you ok?" It was Dave. _Fuck, goddamn fuck shit. _

"Fine, I'm fine." Dave started opening the door.

"DAVE I SAID I WAS FINE YOU ASS." Dave still opened the door. He shook his head when he saw Karkat's incision.

"Karkat, why?" Karkat shed a tear.

"Ana called me a mutant, and I am one, a big fat mutant. My blood color is the color of a mutant. Dave tell me the truth… do you really like me as a friend, or were you assigned to be my friend?" Dave got some paper towel and started wiping the bleeding cut.

"Karkat what're you talking about? I've been your friend since I met you, you're the first friend I've had, you mean the world to me." Karkat smiled.

"Really?" Dave nodded.

"Yes, you mean the world to me, you're the first fried I've had. I would say we are morails." Karkat looked at his arm, the word mutant clearly written across his wrist.

"Me? You? Morails? Wow Dave, you're way to kind, I don't deserve that, I'm a mutant anyway." Dave smiled.

"You're not a mutant, you're Karkat, you're CarinoGeneticist. You're my friend." Karkat smiled again tears in his eyes.

"Thank you Dave." Dave smiled. He saw the cut still hadn't stopped bleeding.

"Fuck, you need attention, the cut won't stop bleeding." Karkat looked at the blood still rushing out strong.

"No, I'll be fine." Dave ran out despite Karkat's protests. He came back with Laura.

"Karkat, oh Karkat. You had to? Why?" Karkat shrugged.

"I'm a mutant, let me believe what I want." Laura shook her head.

"You're not a mutant, you are just like everybody else." Karkat looked at his arm.

"You really did some damage, that's deep." Karkat sighed.

"Dave, you don't know the pain of this. It hurts all the time; it hurts to walk, to eat, and sometimes to breathe." Dave started rolling his sleeves up.

"I know the pain, I do it to. I'm also like you. I know the pain you've felt." Karkat looked at them, some in lines and scarred, others jagged and still scabbed over. Karkat looked at his own, covering his arm, no patterns, no shape, just random. Then the word mutant, still bleeding. Karkat began to cry.

"Dave, can you forgive me for all this, I'm causing you pain and I don't want to." Dave smiled, he sat next to Karakt.

"I can, I'm a friend right?" Karkat nodded.

"You are, you're my only friend here." Dave dabbed the cut again, it stopped bleeding. Laura walked out.

"Dave, you really can do everything." He waved.

"Thanks." He called. Dave hugged Karkat, he knew how it felt when a friend gives you a hug. It felt good knowing someone cared.

"You are my friend, don't ever forget that." Dave let Karkat go.

"I won't, and when you're gone from here I'll hope you someday come back to Earth." Karkat nodded.

"I will." Dave led Karkat out. The rest of the day went quick, and Karkat fell asleep early. He had an undisturbed sleep for the first time in months. The next month went fast, everyday the same schedule and in his free time Karkat learned Dave's dance even though he was reluctant. Dave persisted, and continued to teach Karkat. His weight went from 78 pounds to 87 in a month, and he was one month clean. He could eat solid food again.

"Karkat, at this rate you'll be out in 1 month to month and a half." Karkat smiled again.

"Yes!" Karkat ran to the foyer to find Dave. He slid and fell in front of Dave.

"Careful dude." Karkat laughed.

"Sorry." Dave stood up.

"So what did you run over here for?"

"I'm getting out in one and a half months!" Dave smiled at Karkat.

"Congrats!" Karkat looked at Dave's face; he had a sad look in his eyes.

"Dave, what's wrong?" He sighed and sat back down.

"It's nothing." Karkat sat next to him.

"Hey, you helped me through my pain, I can help you through yours." Dave's eyes had tears in them.

"My Bro died last week, we don't know how though. He was found dead, and I can't come home ever again. I have to live with someone else. I would've been out in 2 months, but now I can't, I don't have a place to go." Karkat hugged Dave.

"Don't worry Dave, it'll be ok, even if you can't see your home again, you're breathing, eating, and alive." Dave tried smiling through his sorrow, but it didn't work.

"Karkat, you've really become a great friend to me, I was alone till you came." Karkat held on to Dave's shoulders.

"I'll give you some advice for the world without me: Don't care about what other people say about you. People do weird things to people who are different, and that's normal. I'd be looked down upon if I were to walk the streets. Don't care about them, for you are loved by someone somewhere." Dave was surprised how kind Karkat was.

"Karkat thanks, I'll need you later when I'm alone. Oh, and you seem different, kinder than normal." Karkat smiled at Dave.

"I guess today is a good day, and Dave please have a good day everyday when I'm gone." Dave nodded.

"Karkat, I will." Karkat went into the garden and watched the sky, after what seemed like hours Dave walked out to join him. He had his ipod.

"Karkat, let's run through the dance again." Karkat was a little eager to dance for it was true that it helped.

"Let's go, Strider."


	11. Chapter 11: The Last Day

**Sorry it took so long to update, I've been busy with gymnastics and stuff, and I just got to updating, I'm trying to update, but I may not update again for a while, I'm sorry :)**

Dave and Karkat went through the dance many times, and Karkat learned the flip to.

"Dude! You did it!" Karkat was beaming, Dave was kind, and happy even at a time like this.

"Dave, where are you going to go now?" Dave shrugged.

"John's place, or Rose's." Karkat sat down.

"I wish you could come back with me." Dave sat down next to Karkat.

"I wish to, but that probably won't happen." Karkat nodded.

"I guess." Dave rolled Karkat's sleeves up, and Karkat flinched.

"Just checking your scars, I'll show you mine to, if you want." Karkat grew excited, he'd never seen Dave's scars. Karkat's cuts were now pink, white, and tan. The word "mutant" still in his arm.

"Wow, your scars were deep, and now as promised, here are mine." Dave sighed, and started rolling his sleeves. His scars were jagged, white, pink, large. It was his whole story in those scars, the days where his cuts were scratches were good days, the deep gauges, and burns were for bad days. Karkat looked at them, and then at Dave's bright face.

"Your smile contrasts your arm." Dave looked at it.

"I know, but they'll be there to remind of the pain I've caused." Karkat hugged Dave.

"I really wish you all the best again, and I hope the wave of sadness passes." Dave smiled.

"I do to, we will make it out ok, we can still breathe, eat, and talk, we'll live." Karkat and Dave talked a little longer. The night was growing close, and Karkat went to bed early. Dave just went to his room, and cried. No one was there to comfort him, until Karkat heard him sobbing at 2 am, and walked over.

"Dave, please tell me." Dave chocked on his sobs.

"I can't ever go home, ever, my bro is gone, my stuff gone, my turntables, gone. I have nothing, and you'll be gone. Why did this happen to me?" Karkat sat next to him, and hugged him.

"I'll get someone." Karkat pressed the emergency call box, and a women came over.

"Dave, what's wrong?" He laid in Karkat's arms to comfort himself, and he was curled in a ball. Karkat explained to her the situation. She sat next to Dave and comforted him.

"Thank you Karkat for telling me this, you may go." Karkat left and went to his room. He tossed and turned and eventually went to sleep. He awoke in the morning to birds chirping. Dave knocked on his door.

"Bro, we should go." Karkat rose out of bed.

"Coming." Kaarkat slid on his favorite hoodie and opened the door.

"You look better, do you remember last night?" Dave nodded.

"Yeah, sorry bout waking you." Karkat shook his head.

"You're fine, you're going through hardships right now." Dave nodded.

"Let's go." They walked to the dinning hall, and sat down. Karkat looked at the food. _Should I eat it, I mean yes I want to get better, but if I do, I'll leave Dave, and Ana will kill me. _Karkat ate some food, and left the rest. Dave couldn't touch his food, he was in too much of a depressed state to eat. The meal time was over 30 minutes later, and the two walked out to the garden. Dave laid in the grasss.

"Do you ever wonder what would happen if we weren't stuck here?" Karkat nodded.

"I wonder how my friends are doing back in Alternia? Do you wonder about your friends, y'know John and Jade and Rose…" Dave nodded.

"I wish I could just see them." Karkat nodded.

"Same here." They sat for a while just looking up at the clouds, and asking each other questions, and answering them. The day was over quickly for them. Dave and Karkat slept soundly that night, and they were happy again. Dave hadn't touched a razor in over a month, and Karkat had been eating normally for a week now. Things were looking up for the two after years of pain. Karkat once looked out the window and smiled at the sun for the first time in years. He was once again happy. Another week passed, and soon came Karkat's last day. Dave awoke him in the morning again.

"Your last day here, are you happy?" Karkat shrugged.

"Well, that means I have to leave you, and everyone here." Dave smiled.

"I'll be fine Karkat, besides we always have pesterchum, right?" Karkat nodded.

"We always do." They smiled and walked down to Karkat's last breakfast. He sat in a different spot next to Dave like always.

"Last breakfast, you look sad Karkat, everything ok?" Karkat nodded.

"I'll just miss this place, that's all." Dave smiled.

"Tomorrow you'll be gone by noon, how'll I survive?" Karkat shrugged.

"Dunno, pesterchum probably." Dave finished his food, and motioned Karkat to leave with him, and so he did.

"We should run through the dance." Karkat started the moves, and Dave joined in later. They did the flip in sync, and then finished to. It was the first time they both did it.

"You wanna make video of it?" Karkat nodded.

"Yeah, sure." They made a video of the dance, and placed it on Karkat's phone.

"I'll watch it when I'm lonely to remember all the happiness you brought me." Dave hugged Karkat.

"I'll miss you so much dude, I won't have anyone to call bro anymore." Karkat awkwardly hugged Dave back.

"You'll survive it somehow, I know you will." They went to their class, and the two sang the loudest, they were happy again, and that's what they wanted. Dinner came soon afterward. They ate together, and then went to Karkat's room.

"Your room is so light, and it is so calm." Karkat nodded.

"I don't know what's so good about it. but everyone says that." They lay on his bed and talked again. It grew close to curfew.

"I'm sorry bro, I gotta go." Karkat waved.

"See ya in the morning." Dave shut the door.

"Sleep tight my friend, last night." Karkat fell asleep soon afterwards. Dave sat in his own room, and scratched at his skin. He just wanted a friend with him when Karkat was gone.

"I'm sorry bro, I didn't want this life, but I guess I now have it."


	12. Chapter 12: Karkat: Come Home

**Sorry it took so long to update. I've been so busy, and with my gymnastics meet season coming up, I may not be able to update for a while. I hope this chapter is to your liking. I loved writing it.**

"Karkat." Karkat sat up; a voice resonated behind his door. It sounded like Kanaya's. Karkat groaned.

"This early already?" She laughed.

"His sleeping patterns haven't changed." Laura giggled, and opened the door.

"Dave Strider was always there to wake him." Karkat wasn't dressed, and he was in his boxers.

"What the hell Kanaya! I'm not dressed." Kanaya smiled.

"You've really calmed down." Karkat grabbed some pants, and a shirt on. He grabbed his bag, which he had packed the night before.

"I need to do something before I leave." Kanaya nodded.

"Do whatever you need." Karkat opened his door ,and crept into the courtyard. He made his way over to Dave's room. Karkat knocked on the door.

"Who is it?" Karkat slowly opened the door.

"Dude, I'm here to say goodbye." Dave smiled, and stood up.

"I knew you'd come, but this early…" Karkat laughed.

"I was woken by Kanaya, I was confused to." Karkat sat on Dave's bed.

"So, how will it be without me?" Dave shrugged.

"Dunno man, boring probably." Karkat laughed.

"I guess I did make things fun while I was here." Dave hugged Karkat tightly.

"I know you have a girl back home, but I will do this so you remember me." Karkat tensed as Dave's lips hit his. Karkat stood mesmerized.

"Why… why did you do that?" Dave smiled.

"I had to give you something so you'd remember me." Karkat loosened up, and hugged Dave tightly.

"I'll miss you a lot." Dave hugged Karkat back.

"I will to, you've made all the difference in my life." The started crying, and it was a beautiful moment for them.

"You'll always be with me." Karkat held up the necklace Dave carved for him during week 7. It was the symbol of his favorite band (Black Veil Brides). He loved that necklace dearly, Dave had one to Karkat forgot the name of the band Dave wanted, but he knew it had saved him.

"Never forget these months we've had, I won't." Dave hugged Karkat tighter. Karkat smiled with tears in his eyes.

"I will remember forever, and even when I'm 25 and ready to leave the hive I'll still remember you." They released the hug, and Karkat waved, still crying.

"I will always remember." Dave walked out of his room, and watched as Karkat left with Kanaya. He waved and smiled.

"I will miss you, and I will never forget you." Karkat waved back.

"Me to." Dave watched as Karkat left the building. He sighed.

"Now what should I do, my only friend is gone." He went to his room, and listened to music when an old song came on.

"I remember this one, I believe it's Disasterology." He started singing to it, and soon he was crying while singing. The song brought back memories. Karkat was sitting in the back of a bus with Kanaya. The were getting to the portal that the prospits opened for them. Karkat looked over the trees to maybe see one last glimpse of Dave. No luck. He sighed. Kanaya put her arm around Karkat.

"You'll be ok, it gets better." Karkat smiled. He was 14 and Kanaya was 16. Karkat looked up at her. He smiled.

"Thank you." He leaned his head on her shoulder, and fell asleep. He felt a shake as Kanaya tried to wake him. He grumbled and sat up.

"We're almost here." Karkat smiled, and then he looked in his bag. A note was in there. He picked that up; it was from Dave.

Karkat,

The past couple months were some of the best months of my life. You were like a brother to me; I thank you for that. I wish someday we will meet again, and someday you can stay in the human world with me when we're not in that hellhole of a place. I have given you a gift. A small gift, but it's a token from the human world. I have given you a shirt. One just like mine, a white and red shirt with the record. A shirt to remember me by. I hope you never forget me, and if you do, I'll never forget you.

-Dave Strider/ TurntechGodhead

Karkat searched his bag, and felt some wrapping paper. He pulled it out, and Kanaya looked at it.

"What's this." Karkat opened it.

"A gift from Dave to me." She looked at it.

"It looks like his shirt." Karkat nodded.

"I guess he duplicated his shirt somehow, and then gave it to me." She looked at it.

"That's a pretty cool shirt." Karkat hugged it tightly, and Kanaya packed his stuff back in his bag. She then tugged at his shoulder.

"C'mon, we have to get off." Karkat stood up, and grabbed his bag. They filed out of the bus, and Kanaya led Karkat to the portal. He sighed.

"Goodbye Dave, I'll miss you." Kanaya hugged him.

'You'll be ok, you've come this far already." Karkat started tearing up.

"Thank you Kanaya, thank you." They stepped through the portal, and Karkat closed his eyes. When he opened them he was in front of the hive. He smiled.

"I'm home Kanaya, I'm home." They walked inside, and Karkat walked to his room. The bed messy, the posters hanging around his room. He turned on the light for the first time in years. The light revealed all the quotes from bands he had painted on his wall, all the pictures from when he was only 3 sweeps, and even him as a grub. His room was lit again, for he had hope again. He heard a rumble coming from the stairs. Then the door to his room burst open.

"KARKAT!" Nepeta jumped into the air, and pounced on him, knocking him over.

"Woah Nepeta, calm yourself." She got up.

"How can I, you're home!" Karkat smiled. He missed Nepeta a lot. After the two reminisced for a while; the other trolls came in. First Solloux, then Gamzee, then Tavros, then Equius, and they all said hi to him one by one. The last troll, and the most reluctant one was Eridan. He came up to Karkat, and first looked down, and then into his eyes.

"Look Kar, I'm sorry for all of this." Karkat looked puzzled.

"What for?" Eridan shuffled his feet.

"For not saying something sooner." Karkat then hugged Eridan.

"I forgive you, I'm fine now." Eridan smiled.

"Wwell, at least I'm forgiven." Karkat then sat on his bed. He playes with the blood red tassels on the sides he had since he was a grub. Eridan left the room. Karkat's back pocket vibrated. He looked at it:

TurntechGodhead began pestering CarcinoGeneticist at 3:03 pm:

TG: Hey bro, did you make it home

CG: YEAH, I DID!

TG: I miss you already, even though it's only been hours

CG: I MISS YOU TO

TG: Did you get the shirt

CG: YEAH, THANK YOU FOR THAT, I TOTTALLY FORGOT TO GET YOU SOMETHING

TG: no you didn't, you gave me hope remember

CG: I DID?

TG: yeah

CG: YOU GAVE ME HOPE

TG: we gave each other the will to carry on

CG: WE DID

TG: so after I get released in about a month I'm going to visit john

CG: YOU HAVE A SOLUTION NOW

TG: yep

CG: WE'LL MEET AGAIN SOMEDAY

TG: Someday in the future perhaps

CG: SOMEDAY

CG: LOOK I HAVE TO GO, KANAYA'S CALLING ME FOR LUNCH

TG: Bye, and don't forget to eat something

CG: ;)

CarcinoGeneticist ceased pestering TurntechGodhead at 3:24 pm.

Karkat walked down to the dining room. He sat next to Nepeta in tears.

"What's wrong?" She asked him. He just smiled at her.

"Somebody cares about me again." She hugged him.


End file.
